How To Deal With A Toxic Mother? –
Moms are supposed to safeguard us from the hard falls and sharp edges, not create them. That doesn’t always happen. If your mom is toxic read on to figure out how you can cope and heal from her toxicity.
Stop trying to please her
If your whole life was lived trying to please your mom and wanting her validation, then it is time to stop, live your life, and do what you ever wanted that you didn’t do trying to please her, if you wanted to move out do so and stop trying to please her.
Remember That Your Feelings & Experiences Are Valid
For you to deal with this you have to constantly remind yourself that Your Feelings and experiences Are Valid, while being raised by a toxic mother will make you feel invalid and non-expressional, once you remind yourself always that your feelings matter and valid you can be able to heal.
Remember that no one, including your mom, is not “all good” or “all bad”
For you to heal you have to know that no one is totally perfect and good, most at times she is loving but toxic at most times, however, that’s not a good reason to be toxic towards your child, once you find peace in knowing that not everyone can be perfect you can then heal and love on.
Once you are bold and old enough you have to set boundaries as assertively as you can, make her see how serious you are with your boundaries and they shouldn’t be crossed, you can set these boundaries by limiting discussions, contact, and your own rules on how you should be addressed.
Acknowledge the pain
Being in denial won’t help you in whatsoever way, I know it’s hard to believe your own mother is toxic and unhealthy for you, but you have to acknowledge that and how hurt you feel, recognizing and accepting your pain will help you heal, because if you keep being in denial it is going to bite back.
Don’t try to change her
As a mother and an adult, she should know what is wrong and right, if you keep trying to change her you will feel disappointed and hurt at the futile result it is better to handle the much you can and leave the rest especially if she doesn’t want to change.
Be Mindful of How Much You Share With her
Best to be careful, especially those things she criticizes you about, you shouldn’t share them anymore, for example, your love life, if she always criticizes you when something goes wrong then stop sharing your relationship with her, forget the fact that she is your mother, the same is applicable to every topic.
Be honest with yourself
Accept the fact that the relationship with her is as it is both present and past, you don’t have to keep being in denial that the relationship would be better or would have been if so so and, so happened.
Don’t think you’ve got it all figured out, when you feel overwhelmed and drowning seek support, from a professional, other family, or friends for help and support this can help you cope with the toxicity and your healing journey.
All those negative criticisms you received from your toxic mom may have taken a toll on you, It is time to rebuild yourself with positive energies, you can start by trying all the things you wanted to achieve.
If you have a toxic mom, try to heal and move on as much as possible.
Read the article to know if your mom is toxic or not if you are not sure Signs Of A Toxic Mother.
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